Doctor Jokes

Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I am a snooker ball.
Well get to the back of the queue!

Doctor, Doctor my husband smells like fish.
Poor sole!

Doctor how can I cure my sleep walking?
Sprinkle tin-tacks on your bedroom floor!

Doctor, Doctor I keep seeing double.
Please sit on the couch.
Which one!

Doctor, Doctor Can I have second opinion?
Of course, come back tomorrow!

Doctor, Doctor I think I’m a rubber band.
Why don’t you stretch yourself out on the couch there and tell me all about it!

Doctor, Doctor My little boy has just swallowed a roll of film!
Hmmmm. Let’s hope nothing develops

Doctor: You seem to be in excellent health. Your pulse is as regular as clockwork.
Patient: That’s because you’ve got your hand on my watch!

Doctor these pills you gave me for Body Odour…
What’s wrong with them?
They keep slipping out from under my arms!

Doctor, Doctor I feel like a pair of curtains.
Well pull yourself together then