Jokes

Whats a frogs favorite game? It’s croak-et! What do headmasters and bullfrogs have in common? Both have big heads that consist mostly of mouth! What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house? The Lizard of Oz! What’s the definition of a nervous breakdown? A chameleon on a tartan rug! How do frogs manage [...]

How do you save a drowning mouse? Use mouse to mouse resuscitation! Where do hamsters come from? Hamsterdam! What’s a mouse’s least favorite record? What’s up Pussycat! Why do mice need oiling? Because they squeak! What do rodents say when they play bingo? ‘Eyes down for a full mouse’! What does a twelve-pound mouse say [...]

What is small, has a long tail and works with the police? A gerbil shepherd dog! What is gray, hairy and lives on a mans face? A mouse-tache! Why did the mouse eat a candle? For some light refreshment! What goes dot, dot, dash, squeak? Mouse code! What do you get if cross a mouse [...]

What do angry rodents send each other at Christmas time? Cross mouse cards! What’s the hardest part of milking a mouse? Getting it to fit over a bucket! Hickory hickory dock. The mouse ran up the clock The clock struck one But the rest got away with minor injuries What do you call a mouse [...]

What are crisp, like milk and go ‘eek, eek, eek’ when you eat them? Mice Krispies! What is small, furry and brilliant at sword fights? A mouseketeer! What do you get if you try to cross a mouse with a skunk? Dirty looks from the mouse! What is a mouse’s favorite record? ‘Please cheese me’! [...]

How do you make a butterfly? Flick it out of the butter dish with a knife! What is a myth? A female moth! What insect lives on nothing? A moth, because it eats holes How do stones stop moths eating your clothes? Because rolling stones gather no moths! What do insects learn at school? Mothmatics! [...]

How do you know if you have a tough mosquito? You slap him and he slaps you back! What is the most religious insect? A mosque-ito! What has 6 legs, bits and talks in code? A morese-quito! What is the difference between a mosquito and a fly? Try sewing buttons on a mosquito! What do [...]

Where would you put an injured insect? In an antbulance! What’s an insects best chat up line? Pardon me, but is this stool taken! What has four wheels and flies? A rubbish bin! What happened to the man who turned into an insect? He just beetled off! What is green and brown, has four legs [...]

What is a grasshopper? An insect on a pogo stick! What do you call a grasshopper with no legs? A grasshover! Why is it better to be a grasshopper than a cricket? Because grasshoppers can play cricket but crickets can’t play grasshopper! What is green and can jump a mile in a minute? A grasshopper [...]

How do fireflies start a race? Ready steady glow! If there are 5 flies in the kitchen how do you know which one is the American Football player? The one in the sugar bowl! How do you keep flies out of the kitchen? Put a pile of manure in the living room! What did one [...]