Jokes

A witch joke What is the difference between a witch and the letters M A K E S? One make spells and the other spell makes! A witch joke What goes cackle, cackle, bonk? A witch laughing her head off! A witch joke Why do witches go to the docks? To see the bats being [...]

A witch joke What’s yellow and very poisonous? Witch infested custard! A witch joke Why did the witch buy two tickets to the zoo? One to get in and one to get out! A witch joke What do you call a wich made of cotton and has lots of holes in her? A string hag! [...]

A vampire joke What happened at the vampires race? It finished neck and neck! A vampire joke What’s a vampire’s favourite drink? A bloody mary! A ghost joke Why did the car stop when it saw a ghost? It had a nervous breakdown! A vampire joke What do vampires sing on New Year’s Eve? “Auld [...]

A ghost joke What did the ghost teacher say to her class? Watch the board and I’ll go through it again! A ghost joke Who writes ghosts joke s? Crypt writers! A vampire joke Why did the vampire stand at the bus stop with a finger up his nose? He was a ghoulsniffer! A vampire [...]

A werewolf joke How do you stop a werewolf chasing you? Throw a stick and say fetch! A werewolf joke How do you know if two werewolves have been in the fridge? Two pairs of paw prints in the butter! A vampire joke What’s Dracula’s favourite coffee? Decoffinated! A werewolf joke What do you get [...]

A ghost joke Why are ghosts bad at telling lies? Because you can see right through them! A vampire joke What does a vampire bath in? A bat tub! A werewolf joke Why did the boy take a pain killer after hearing a werewolf howl? Because it gave him eerie ache! A vampire joke What [...]

A witch joke Why do witches scratch themselves all the time? Because they’re the only ones who know where a witch itches! A vampire joke Do you know that Dracula wants to be a comedian? He’s still looking for a crypt writer though! A werewolf joke What do you call an extinct hairy beast? A [...]

A skeleton joke What happened to the skeleton that was attacked by a dog? He ran off with some bones and didn’t leave him with a leg to stand on! A werewolf joke Where does the werewolf sit in the cinema? Anywhere he wants to! A ghost joke How do ghosts like their drinks? Ice [...]

Q: What is a ghost’s favourite day of the week? A: Frightday! Q: Where do Chinese vampires come from? A: Fanghai! Q: Why did the skeleton pupil stay late at school? A: He was boning up for his exams! Q: How do you join the Dracula fan club? A: Send your name, address and blood [...]

A ghost joke What airline do ghouls fly with? British Scareways! A cannibal joke What do cannibals eat at partys? Buttered host! A vampire joke What happened to the lovesick vampire? He became a neck-romancer! A cannibal joke What happened when the cannibal ate the speaking clock? It repeated him! A vampire joke Which vampire [...]