Jokes

Three old ladies were seating on a bench in a park. They were enjoying the tranquility when a man wearing a trench-coat suddenly appeared right in front of them. Standing very close to the three old ladies, he opened his coat an FLASHED himself. The first old lady was so shocked she fainted. The second [...]

3 POWs were caught by the Germans in a war. They were told that they will be shot at while they ran 100 meters. If they survived after that they would then be set free. So, the 3, a British, a Japanese & a Singaporean, lined up at the start. Bang! They started to ran [...]

A Singapore English radio station, was holding a live radio segment at a shopping mall. The DJ was hosting a game show where prizes were given away to kids on stage if they could name the opposite gender of animals. The first kid to come on stage was a girl. “What’s your name girl & [...]

Since 1-April-97, competition has been very keen in Singapore’s cellular phone market due to the new entrant M1. Before that, there was only one operator, that’s why no one covers more of Singapore than Singtel Mobile, absolutely no one. AMPS was the first system that Singtel launched, an Ageing Mobile Phone System. After that they [...]

There were four Buddhist monks who played instruments and chanted everyday. One fine morning, a lady in a mini skirt went into the temple to pray. When the lady knelt down to pray, one of the chanting monks saw the lady tsao k’ng (i.e. exposing herself accidentally). The monk was shocked to see that the [...]

Ah Beng was talking to his girlfriend’s brother Ah Leng while walking down orchard road. Seeing a bunch of girls window shopping, he asked Ah Leng, ‘Ay, did you know your sister Ah Lian is like vely the bias one?’ Ah Leng replied, ‘Really ah? Bias is it? How is she the bias?’ Ah Beng [...]

During the Japanese Occupation, 3 Singaporeans, Ah Meng, Ah Seng and Ah Beng were caught for smuggling. They were sentenced to death by firing squad. That night, Ah Meng came up with a plan. He told the others that the Japanese were afraid of natural disasters. So he would cause them to panic, and escape [...]

Last night, an incident took place at Boat Quay. What happened was some idiot was trying to show off and declared that he would swim across the Singapore River. He jumped in and started swimming. But before he could reach the halfway mark, he started to panic and started to shout for help. Being typical [...]

Ah Beng, Mohammad and Muthu were at sea when they were hijacked by a group of pirates. The pirates cornered the 3 men and said “Give us all your valuables!” The chief pirate then raised a syringe and added, “Or else we’ll inject you with the AIDS virus!” Mohammad quickly stripped off all his valuables [...]

Once upon a time, there was a king who had a daughter of marriageable age. As he was very fond of his daughter and he didn’t want her to leave him, he made an impossible offer to his kingdom’s men. He announced that whoever has two pricks would be eligible to marry his daughter. The [...]